Performative Leadership vs. True Leadership: The Difference Between Looking the Part and Leading the Way
Leadership isn’t about putting on a show. But in today’s world, performative leadership is everywhere—loud, flashy, and designed for clicks rather than impact.
True leadership? It’s quieter, steadier, and much harder to fake.
Recently, Brad Stulberg captured this contrast perfectly in a tweet about Timothée Chalamet’s SAG Awards speech versus Elon Musk’s chainsaw-wielding performance at CPAC. Chalamet spoke about continuous improvement, studying the greats, and pursuing excellence. Musk, on the other hand, ran around on stage with a chainsaw to symbolize his aggressive cost-cutting tactics.
The difference? One is actually doing the work of mastery. The other is performing the role of power.
The Age of Performative Leadership
We live in a world where image-building is easy and actual leadership is rare.
It’s not just in business. We see it everywhere:
Performative Wellness: The influencer who films their entire cold plunge routine every morning versus the elite athlete training in solitude.
Performative Hustle: The entrepreneur who constantly talks about their “grind” versus the founder quietly building something great.
Performative Masculinity: The guy flexing dominance on social media versus the one showing up as a true leader in his home, business, and community.
The trick of performative leadership is that it often looks like the real thing—at least on the surface. It thrives on big gestures, public declarations, and exaggerated confidence. But if you strip away the theatrics, there’s not much underneath.
What True Leadership Looks Like
The best leaders don’t spend their energy proving they are leaders. They just lead.
1. True Leadership Is Grounded in Mastery, Not Ego
Real leaders are obsessed with getting better, not just looking impressive. They study, refine, and improve—not to be seen doing it, but because they care deeply about their craft.
Think about the best speakers you’ve ever heard. They don’t need gimmicks or shock value. They hold a room with substance. They connect through clarity, conviction, and genuine insight.
2. True Leadership Prioritizes Substance Over Spectacle
You won’t find the best athletes filming every training session—they’re too busy putting in the reps. You won’t find the best CEOs live-tweeting every meeting—they’re deep in the work of building something meaningful.
True leaders understand that their real work happens behind the scenes.
3. True Leadership Requires Emotional Intelligence
Performative leaders focus on controlling perception—they want to be seen as powerful, dominant, or untouchable.
True leaders focus on earning trust and delivering results—they understand that credibility is built over time through consistency, integrity, and action.
The Takeaway: Choose Depth Over Drama
In today’s world, it’s easy to be distracted by pseudo-leadership. It’s entertaining. It’s loud. It’s everywhere.
But if you’re serious about real, lasting impact, ask yourself:
• Am I spending more time showing up for the work or proving that I’m doing the work?
• Am I making decisions based on deep knowledge or chasing trends and external validation?
• Am I building something that will last, or am I focused on getting quick attention?
The best leaders aren’t the loudest. They’re the ones who create real change, lead with conviction, model consistency and fallibility, and build something that doesn’t need to be performed—because its impact speaks for itself.
